remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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