It's chlamydia! Thank God!
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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