Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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