its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
We need to rekindle our bromance
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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