That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
