...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
