Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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