Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
even my farts smell like vagina
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Randomize
