i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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