is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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