i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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