Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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