What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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