Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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