Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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