just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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