4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
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It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
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I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Shame - the story of my life.
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