I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
