It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
this hospital has no fireball
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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