every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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