How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
this boner is exhausting
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
