pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
