I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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