You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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