My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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