I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
