We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
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