he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize