she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Randomize
