It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
