I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i think my mom watched the whole time
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
