I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
