He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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