she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
