Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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