I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
