When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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