im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I need water and some morals
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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