THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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