I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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