It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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