So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
