Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize