...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
