bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
