did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
