i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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