i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
