Having a random hookup so left but love u
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
