Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
