i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Green mimosas i think yes
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
